College Sports Enthusiast Gifts

The feeding frenzy has begun, gorging ourselves on bowl after bowl of college football.

It's unlikely the "Deadly Sins" team from Hades University will go far in the basketball tourney. Wrath is suspended for arguing with the refs and sloth always skips practice. Pride puts too much pressure on himself and greed won't risk an injury that would blow his chances for a pro contract. Lust is distracted by the cheerleaders and Envy wants the shots all the other players are getting. Gluttony is the only player thriving in the tournament spotlight. Yeah, he just eats up all the atten

Fighting Sioux

'Coach - do you know the definition for 'losing coach''

Good Health

'There's more to life than winning. There's also getting schools to pay you a share of their ticket and sports memorabilia sales.'

"His number is the amount of payola he received to play basketball for his college."

University of Nebraska sold out for 375 games in a row but now is in danger of ending that due to poor performance.

Go team!

"College basketball recruiters are after him."

'He always tees off like that. He used to throw the discus in college.'

'It's a combination of March Madness,,, and Linsanity,'

Cheerleaders

The Giamatti era

'Play any other position besides Monday morning quarterback?'

Basketball Tourney. Ernie, you're crushing everybody in the office basketball pool! You've picked the winner of every game so far! It's amazing because you don't know a thing about basketball. For you, picking the winner of every tournament game is like correctly guessing a coin flip sixty seven times in a row! No, I have a system! It seems everybody has an opinion about the tourney so I listened to what my investment advisor thought about the teams. And with his record of picking winners

'I've decided to skip my senior year and go directly into an endless cycle of unrealistic expectations and failure.'

College game crowd: 'WE WON',,,'and that somehow makes you superior'

'What do you mean you didn't learn anything? You learned how to tackle, didn't you?'

Baseball players and their qualifications.

Coach Prime Cleans House

Tax What?!

Our coaches are from top college teams. Questions. Why aren't you in training? Sports Camp. Rotator cuff injury. Concussion. Back surgery. Counselor. Ok, campers. Let's show them what you've got! Excellent health insurance card representation!

The Thurston State Hornets make their entry onto the field.

So you're wearing a bag over your head because you're ashamed of your team?' 'It's a cloaking device.'

"How are my animal mascot teams doing?"

'Ring around the rosey ...'

'Remember, your father may be here physically, but mentally he's attending the NCAA tournament.'

'There really is no need for confusion. Rule 10, section 5, article a, subsection 3, exception 4 quite clearly states ... '

With the Inflatable Pocket Potty, you'll never have to wait in line again at the stadium.

'So you're the referee who had the courage to call a Technical Foul on Bobby Knight.'

"I can't decide whether to turn pro first or go directly into rehab."

Pardon me, I think you dropped this. Ivy League Football Is Different.

Forget about the college basketball tourney, endless drilling in 100-degree summer heat is the real "march madness."

"Just the, two recruiters from the college's awning leap team drove by."