Christianity Buff Gifts

'Wait a minute... What the heck is frankincense?'

The Last Supper or the First Easter?

'Nobody's leaving till I get the offering plate back!'

Promised Land Directory.

'No room at the inn, baby born in a manger: It's gonna be a great story to tell at parties...'

"Yes. I said 2 by 2, but you needed to use 2 by 4s for the Ark...begin again."

"It's OK, I'm preordained."

"The water changes them back into babies. I think they call it the Fountain of Youth."

"I think I've figured out why we can't find the marina."

'Thou shalt not steal...except for bases.'

'I was hoping you'd sign them 'To my good buddy Moses!''

'Yes, all at once!'

"On the eighth day, God found a lot of assembly parts left over."

"Today, I'll be cherry-picking from Deuteronomy."

"OMG, LOL!"

TSA Noah

"How was I supposed to know that the apple was a controlled substance?"

“...And on the ninth day God created mosquitoes, just to annoy the hell out of everyone.”

'Let's have some fun... give Eve extra memory.'

'Are we there yet?'

Dogma

"If you think you made a stink pulling the fruit, try pulling His finger."

"Believe me it's only an apple."

"God works in mysterious ways."

'The ten commandments have all been reduced to tweets.'

Bible Bloopers

'Number three?', 'This is NOT a quiz!'

'Look man, no wings!'

Caption Contest TK

"I love it when your eyes blaze like that; you remind me of Moses."

'We're going to start this week's sermon with a review of the basics....'

"Mark, you have to stop calling John's gospel 'Fan Fiction.'"

'Even More Disciples'

'I'll raise you, Lazarus...'

The Vicar 's Invitation to Dinner.