Christianity Buff Pillows

'Wait a minute... What the heck is frankincense?'

The Last Supper or the First Easter?

'Nobody's leaving till I get the offering plate back!'

'No room at the inn, baby born in a manger: It's gonna be a great story to tell at parties...'

"It's OK, I'm preordained."

"I think I've figured out why we can't find the marina."

'Thou shalt not steal...except for bases.'

'I was hoping you'd sign them 'To my good buddy Moses!''

'Yes, all at once!'

"On the eighth day, God found a lot of assembly parts left over."

TSA Noah

'Let's have some fun... give Eve extra memory.'

"OMG, LOL!"

“...And on the ninth day God created mosquitoes, just to annoy the hell out of everyone.”

"How was I supposed to know that the apple was a controlled substance?"

"Today, I'll be cherry-picking from Deuteronomy."

'Are we there yet?'

Dogma

"Believe me it's only an apple."

'Look man, no wings!'

'Number three?', 'This is NOT a quiz!'

Bible Bloopers

'The ten commandments have all been reduced to tweets.'

Caption Contest TK

"I love it when your eyes blaze like that; you remind me of Moses."

"God works in mysterious ways."

'We're going to start this week's sermon with a review of the basics....'

"Mark, you have to stop calling John's gospel 'Fan Fiction.'"

'Even More Disciples'

"Oh sorry, those are the Ten Commandments. Hang on, I'll get you a menu."

'I'll raise you, Lazarus...'

"Now tell us, Davey, what kind of rock did you use?"

A vicar is reading 'The Great Begatsby' written by Abraham.

"Enough with the treehugging already!"

The Vicar 's Invitation to Dinner.