Cheesy Chef-y Humor Gifts

Mixing Business and Pleasure

Too Many Lawyers Spoil the Broth

Wife: 'Ah, honey.....why are you covered in raw fish and rice?' Husband: 'Oh I was running late for the 6:15 and got on a darn sush train by mistake!'

"Do you want to be vaguely dissatisfied with Italian or Korean?"

'I think I'll go home and eat'

"No thanks, I'm stuffed."

A Club Sandwitch.

"That’s a toaster. It’s a tanning bed for bread."

'It's labour-saving because with this you'll be able to burn my meals much faster!'

"I might just get a pie."

"Carpe pizza"

"Do we really need the interactive garbage disposer?"

'Ok. I'm cooking dinner. What sounds good?'

Alphabet soup

"This IS a chicken fried steak!"

'Hello, Ebeneezer! It's me - the ghost of coming dinner!'

The Good Feud Guide - 'Delia Smith does a nice roasted Worrall-Thompson.'

Tartar sauce.

"We need a new stove. This one's beginning to burn oil."

'YAY! PATE!'

'Turns out medicine is the best medicine.'

'Todays special - egg on Ronay'

"I've been a chef for far too long...."

'I hope it's okay -- the cookbook had some really confusing abbreviations.'

Three Pigs.

'No, no... I ordered a tart, not a tort!'

"Chicken on a bend of spinach and onions?"

"Gimme a double burger between two burgers. And hold the lettuce; it only dilutes the experience."

"Rare, medium or well done?"

"He left with two other slices of bread, turkey, bacon, lettuce and toothpicks. I think they went clubbing."

Sun Dried Ice Cubes

'Pardon me, M'sieur -- Did you order 'grilled cheese' or 'chilled grease'?'

"Tonight I'm making spotted bass. Tomorrow night, spotted spaghetti."

'It's the same as our regular Angels hair pasta, but with extra grease.'

"That's $3.50 for the dog plus 75 cents toxic cooking water disposal surcharge."