Cellphone Chatter Pillows

'Will everyone please hold it down! Can't you see I'm trying to use my cellphone?'

"Hey, pal—this isn't the quiet car."

"Yes Dad, I passed math and now I'm passing chemistry and physics."

"I've had a lot of exercise today! I jumped to several conclusions, ran my mouth on the phone, and I just cycled through 500 cable channels!"

Fred's new phone plan included unlimited Dada.

Dog FM. (Man blowing dog whistle into radio microphone).

"Nice talking to you too, even if you are a recorded message."

'Thanks mum, it's just what I always wanted!'

"I could have been a big celebrity but for my fear of public speaking."

Phone solicitors like customers who are afraid to hang up.

"I told you never to call me here."

Flotation Device on the Phone

'From the Mouth of Arthur Baskin.'

Hot Line

'If that's the Police Station - we're not here!'

'Are you in here tonight?'

"You know that on-line romance you've been carryin' on? Well this here's Samantha!"

'I gotta go - we're discussing my compulsive communicatoins disorder.'

"You are sooooo 'grazed!'"

'Can't you tell people about our new swimming pool without saying I've 'gone off the deep end?''

'Good morning. I'd like to talk about double glazing issues.'

"I'd love to talk. I'm on a train!"

Well look, I'm afraid I really must run...

"No problem, B. J. I can talk and baste at the same time."

Hello? Sylvia? Oh, hey, girl... Can I call you right back? I was just puttin' my curlers in.

"They said it had a V-8, so I assumed it would run on tomato juice!"

'Sorry but my disposable income is tied up in a roast in the oven.'

New Space Shuttle Mission: Deployment of the First Orbiting Telemarketer

"This is the wine talking."

'I really don't miss the water cooler.'

Phone Dating: Man imagines a gorgeous girl while woman thinks of a handsome man.

'Take two asprin and call my wife in the morning.'

'My name is Kerry and I'm an email-aholic...'

'I'll call you back. I'm sleepwalking!'

"You'll have to speak up. I'm very loud in here."