Cattleman Gifts

'Son,when someone asks you what your daddy does,say I'm a cattleman,not a bull shipper.'

"God, I hate cows."

High Riders of the Old West

Cattlemans Saloon.

'All right. I'll count sheep, but I thought we were cattlemen.'

'Yes, I am looking for an experienced cattleman.'

"Daisy had twin bull calves. How'd you do?"

'Do you think he's ready for the big round-up?'

"They're comfortable."

'We're taking over tonight, it's the only way to save the farm.'

"Lovely dovetail."

Pre-Historic Gentleman's Duel

I love embroidery

Waiting for retirement.

'Pass the salt, will ya, buddy?'

"So, how did the audition go?" "Great! I really nailed it."

Hammer and chisel discussing what they've been doing, chisel says; 'Oh you know, getting into a few scrapes.'

"Awfully quiet... Must be a big game on!"

Education and Apprenticeships

"Old timers are quick to tell me that the drive to Abilene was different in their day."

'Credit being what it is, I'm sure you won't mind if we see your 200,000 cattle first...'

"In every situation, an executive has to decide whether to lead by consensus, charisma or cattle prod. Trust me... it's not always this easy!"

How Do You Like My Moseying Along?

"I hear you've got friends in high places...?"

"I like it here but if Santa doesn't get better WiFi I'm getting a new job."

"I'm the ghost of woodshop past."

"Any chance you could do it at a higher resolution?"

Luthier

Little boy blows a larger bubble than glass blower can.

Darn you, you stupid hammer!

'After a hard day hunting, I relax by working my patch of green stuff.'

"Year after year we sit here quietly raising eyebrows, son."

'How can anyone seriously believe that we sleep standing up and with our eyes open ,,,, Hello'

"I prefer the mountains to the beach. I feel like less of a cow.''

"Just so you understand in advance - we're not old-time craftsmen, and we don't take pride in our work."