Cattle Rancher Gifts

"No one is making you do anything you don't want. I'm just saying we're all headed for Dodge City and we think you should come along."

"All hat and no cattle but, my god, what a hat."

'Can't understand all this fuss over cattle growth hormones.'

'Just had to text and ride, didn't you?'

'Name tag's up here, Ma'am - I'm from the Cattlemen's Delegation.

Notice: It doesn't matter what Cliven Bundy Says. You still have to pay taxes!

"Yeah, I'm an IVF baby too, and my sire's registration is CANM2044017 too! We're half brothers!"

'WOOHOO! I love Methane!'

"I'm roundin' up a posse."

A Modern Day Cowboy and his Horse.

"You're not helping the methane problem, you know."

"Holstein? Funny, you don't look Jewish."

"Bad news - aged steak means they get the steak, and then let it age, not that they let us age, and then get the steak."

"My last husband left me to be a hamburger."

"Listen honey, I don't claim to be no expert but I reckon you're going about this cowpuncher thing the whole wrong way."

Tattoo Removal

How Do You Like My Moseying Along?

"It's that dreadful wrangler who keeps trying to cut us out from the rest of the herd. Simply ignore him."

'They've got good working conditions here but they have a lousy retirement plan.'

'Pass the salt, will ya, buddy?'

Betsy's not too happy with Ralph's new turbo milker.

Cattle barons for world domination.

'How can anyone seriously believe that we sleep standing up and with our eyes open ,,,, Hello'

'Wait...nobody move. I lost a contact.'

They're Brazillian!

"I said reach for the sky stranger. It's a figure of speech. I didn't mean literally!"

Space Hopper Rodeo

"Oh, God, it's the Herefords, pretend we don't see them."

"Move over, pardner, yer ridin' in the horsepool lane!"

"You think they'll get the message?"

"I prefer the mountains to the beach. I feel like less of a cow.''

"I suppose they're less skillful with a rope than they once were, but I'm not complaining."

'Keep me informed of the herds' mood.'

"Well if I can't be a cowboy I'll be a lawyer for cowboys."

'Little Yank' Calf Puller.