Cattle Rearer Gifts

Barn

Shepherd

Shepherd

New Guy.

'Do you think he's ready for the big round-up?'

'Cool! Brownstar Wars!'

'Pass the salt, will ya, buddy?'

"Old timers are quick to tell me that the drive to Abilene was different in their day."

'Credit being what it is, I'm sure you won't mind if we see your 200,000 cattle first...'

Glasses on, Crazy Cowman's secret identity was safe

A cow ventriloquist.

'I'm about to die and now I realise I have REALLY BAD breath!'

How Do You Like My Moseying Along?

'How can anyone seriously believe that we sleep standing up and with our eyes open ,,,, Hello'

A Modern Day Cowboy and his Horse.

"I prefer the mountains to the beach. I feel like less of a cow.''

Ranch Dressing

'...OK so you've got the herd mentality... now go out tere and be a herd... now move!'

"Year after year we sit here quietly raising eyebrows, son."

"Oh God, yes! I've been a bad cow! Such a bad, naughty cow! Again! Yes!"

Spring branding on the Hashtag Ranch.

"Fast forward to the part where you herd me."

Therapy for the cow dependent

"Speed bumps have reduced stampede injuries."

'This is the Polled Texas Longhorn - the breed of the future!'

"You're not helping the methane problem, you know."

The first stock exchange - 'It's agreed then, one of my Longhorns for one of your holsteins.'

'I told him that's where we keep the keys to his ride.'

"When I fall in love – It will be.... for heifer..."

They're Brazillian!

'No, I own the cattle. He's the vet!'

'Can't understand all this fuss over cattle growth hormones.'

Cattle farmer's super-market

'Name tag's up here, Ma'am - I'm from the Cattlemen's Delegation.

"Listen honey, I don't claim to be no expert but I reckon you're going about this cowpuncher thing the whole wrong way."