Cattle Raising Gifts

"First we get a bunch of cows."

How Cows Psych Themselves Up

"They've just got a better grade of weed over there!"

'Getting these old cows gastric bypass surgery cost too much money Marge.We're gonna lose the farm for sure now!'

'If he says 'got milk', I'm gonna bite.

"Where did you get this from?"

"I'm part Irish on my mother's side."

"Looks like Daisy's at it again."

"I hope that bull is safe."

"I have a beef with you!"

"Until the vaccine is completely rolled out, we're gonna keep our distance."

'Lactose intolerant, eh? Must be tricky, what with being a Maasai an' all....'

'Super size mine. Who knows when Mr. Money Bags will take me out grazing again.'

"And now read the bottom sirloin, farmer Brown."

'Dad, you told me to use my initiative if I needed money so I sold a cow.'

'Whose darn idea were these brand stickers?'

Bless you!

"A bum steer... Must be from your side of the family."

A apt cow traffic sign

Hey! I've found a long one!!

'I'm about to die and now I realise I have REALLY BAD breath!'

'I'm Angus MacGregor. Is this where I join?'

"Your grass looks great."

Where 'Beef Jerky' comes from.

They're Brazillian!

'The McWit boy wasn't likely to go cow tipping on his neighbor's farm again.'

'That's not how it works fellas!'

Farmyard Scene

"Got any grass?"

'Do you think he's ready for the big round-up?'

New Guy.

'Pass the salt, will ya, buddy?'

Lady taking her Cochin chickens for a walk.

"Old timers are quick to tell me that the drive to Abilene was different in their day."

'Credit being what it is, I'm sure you won't mind if we see your 200,000 cattle first...'