Cattle Management Gifts

'My neighbor hates to fix fence...'

Shepherd

'We're taking over tonight, it's the only way to save the farm.'

'Cool! Brownstar Wars!'

'Rabbits make great pets, but it's best to have them one at a time.'

Miniature Cattle Fanciers

'This model is hard to get parts for.'

'I think he's got a bad case of Bluetooth Disease.'

"Old timers are quick to tell me that the drive to Abilene was different in their day."

'This'll save a couple of journeys!'

Glasses on, Crazy Cowman's secret identity was safe

"In every situation, an executive has to decide whether to lead by consensus, charisma or cattle prod. Trust me... it's not always this easy!"

'Credit being what it is, I'm sure you won't mind if we see your 200,000 cattle first...'

'I'm about to die and now I realise I have REALLY BAD breath!'

A cow ventriloquist.

'..The wolves have got the sheep pinned against their own 1-yard line again!'

'That hussy. She's always first in line for insemination.'

'Bad news! We're hamsters!'

Ranch Dressing

"Year after year we sit here quietly raising eyebrows, son."

"Okay, now we're too domesticated."

'...OK so you've got the herd mentality... now go out tere and be a herd... now move!'

"Oh God, yes! I've been a bad cow! Such a bad, naughty cow! Again! Yes!"

If only I had noticed the cow in the teleporter, I'd be accepting the Nobel prize now!

Spring branding on the Hashtag Ranch.

Therapy for the cow dependent

Cowboy Slippers

'This is the Polled Texas Longhorn - the breed of the future!'

They're Brazillian!

Whaaaah!(Scarey ghost shaped fart).

The first stock exchange - 'It's agreed then, one of my Longhorns for one of your holsteins.'

'Yesterday he was a kingpin, but today he's just a lynchpin.'

Rancher builds fence around angry bull.

"Whoa. Jeff. You snagged your sweater."

"We should have taken a eweber."