Cattle Rancher Humor Gifts

'I think I've worked out why they fed us so well.'

'Sure, they're invaders, but you have to agree: Those Vikings have great helmets!'

Hedge of two moo cows

A sure sign of rain

Motorherd

'Pass the salt, will ya, buddy?'

'How are you at thinking outside the flocks?'

Wow, I don't know why we don't sit down like this more often!

Cow in a vest: Well, I think I look like Bruce Willis!

How Do You Like My Moseying Along?

'How can anyone seriously believe that we sleep standing up and with our eyes open ,,,, Hello'

A Modern Day Cowboy and his Horse.

"I prefer the mountains to the beach. I feel like less of a cow.''

"Year after year we sit here quietly raising eyebrows, son."

'This is your third speeding ticket in a week. Sure your horse didn't get into some genetically modified hay?'

'I don't know if she's gonna be much good. I don't think she's even registered.'

"You're not helping the methane problem, you know."

YAAY! Slam dump!

They're Brazillian!

"Daddy says he got the promotion: We'll be able to afford to move to greener pastures!"

"Who allowed Andy Serkis to Mo-Cap Beverly?"

'My wife, my rancher, his artificial insemination device!'

'Can't understand all this fuss over cattle growth hormones.'

'Name tag's up here, Ma'am - I'm from the Cattlemen's Delegation.

Cattle barons for world domination.

Feed & Grain. Credit Cards and E-Payments Only. Being a cash cow is tougher than it used to be.

'WOOHOO! I love Methane!'

'I'm a fat cattle buyer.'

The Moo-Walk

"Oh, God, it's the Herefords, pretend we don't see them."

'He always gets that way when I ask him about our retirement plan,'

"We're raising them for turkey bacon."

"Listen honey, I don't claim to be no expert but I reckon you're going about this cowpuncher thing the whole wrong way."

"No one is making you do anything you don't want. I'm just saying we're all headed for Dodge City and we think you should come along."

'Just had to text and ride, didn't you?'