Cattle Crooner Gifts

'Oh, shut up!'

'Wake up, dear...did you order extra milk?!'

Cow Show Tunes

Motorherd

'You do a passable Jerry Lewis, but your Frank Sinatra stinks.'

Where 'Pastor'-ized Milk Comes From...

"They’re real."

Pull the udder one

Bashful in Nashville

"We would like to be genetically modified to taste like Brussels sprouts."

Cow noticing the grass is wet. So he wanders off and performs a fabulous powerslide!

We come in pieces!

"You're wondering why I've called you here."

'I can't write cheating songs because my wife's too insecure.'

'Mama! Aliens.'

'He's the best bull I've ever had.'

"Kind words help the dairy cow produce good milk. They go in one ear and out the udder."

Sorry, I thought you said you wanted to see 'Parrot Normal Activity'

Cow in a vest: Well, I think I look like Bruce Willis!

'The first day on the job was not going well for Al...'

World of Cow.

Singer in a boat disturbing the fish.

'Woke up this morning found someone had stolen my guitar...'

'I'm about to die and now I realise I have REALLY BAD breath!'

"Year after year we sit here quietly raising eyebrows, son."

'A lot of my stories involve milk.'

"I came all the way from Alabama just to see you, Susanna. Why in tarnation are you cryin'?"

Farmer Pickles hated it when the cows hummed Darth Vader's theme tune.

"What do you mean, we don't have an 'exit strategy'?!"

'Your barn door's open.'

Therapy for the cow dependent

I'm just saying he picked a hell of a time to have a Susan Boyle moment.

'My wife, my rancher, his artificial insemination device!'

This'n song here, "She Done Me Wrong 'n' That Ain't Right," goes out to my high school english teacher.

Music from the moon.