Country Crooners Gifts

Birth Of A Musical Genre.

"This is my new country song I wrote about my self-driving truck leaving me..."

'Cock-a-doodle-do!'

'You do a passable Jerry Lewis, but your Frank Sinatra stinks.'

Bashful in Nashville

'I can't write cheating songs because my wife's too insecure.'

'Woke up this morning found someone had stolen my guitar...'

"I'll be broadminded up in heaven, but here on earth you're still a whore..."

"This next song's about spreading risk in a volitile market by diversification"

"I came all the way from Alabama just to see you, Susanna. Why in tarnation are you cryin'?"

"Well of course you're depressed... You're a country and western singer."

Hip-Hopalong Billy Bob blamed the censors for killing the country-rap scene.

Testing...testing...one, two, three...

"Not tonight, hon—I've got a heartache."

This'n song here, "She Done Me Wrong 'n' That Ain't Right," goes out to my high school english teacher.

'Oh, shut up!'

Music from the moon.

'Old blue-screen's back!'

Dolly Parton

Rhinestone Accountant

'The song made it seem so much more serene.'

The New Modern-Day Lament.

A chicken coop with a loudspeaker on the roof

Banjo Player

'One more yippeee-ki-yi from Roy Rogers back there,and i'm putting a hoof through that guitar.'

"This next song's about our desperate struggle to please and chronic craving for approval. I really, really hope you like it."

"May I remind you that until quite recently it wasn't called the Lyle Lovett look. It was called the Eraserhead look."

"Gentlemen, let's pick it up again with 'I Been Livin' on Cold Navy Beans.'"

Willie Nelson's 80th Birthday.

Country Girl Yeee Haaa!

Nashville Peacock

The Trace Adkins Diet

In concert with Garth Vader

Would you mind if I hung round your backside for a while?

Cowboy's to-do list.