Canine Cuisine Critiquer Gifts

-'God that looks disgusting.' -'You're telling me.'

"See? I told you changing his food would be traumatizing."

Raw food, after you leave for work.

"Hmmm... low ash content. Smells like someone switched to canola oil... wait, is that tripe I smell?"

'I think I'll go home and eat'

'Oh come on! I can't be that bad!'

'Try the steak tartare...it's okay.'

"Is that all they taught him at obedience school? How to use a can opener?"

'I'll have toast and he'll have a complete dog's breakfast.'

"If man is my best friend, why is he giving me this crap to eat?"

'I had no idea there were so many types of dog treats.'

'You may well have eaten fresher fish before but not in this restaurant. . .'

"We need to put in more bones."

'Mutt is very insulting and definitely politically incorrect, but where do I find an animal rights attorney at this hour of the night?'

'Snob, he won't eat domestic slugs, just imports.'

"'Market Price' isn't about the food. It's what we think we can charge YOU."

"For what he is about to receive may the dog be truly thankful."

Dog Chow Mein

"You're spoiling that dog again!"

Four Star Meal

'May I have two containers - fish for my cat, meat for the dog...vegetables divided as follows, one-fourth for the cat, three-fourths for the dog, but no carrots for the cat - kitty doesn't like carrots...'

Taste of the east (London).

Dog Food Pyramid. Meat. Scraps.

"So, what's it to be, chicken unfit for human consumption, or beef unfit for human consumption?"

'You're lucky you can't read.'

Meat Department

"Let's see . . . I detect beef . . . peas . . . and a subtle hint of sweet potato!"

"Don't be fooled, it looks easy but I've yet to meet a dog who's mastered it."

'I'm taking the leftovers home, so suggest something my dog will enjoy.'

'Sure, it's a nice buffet, but I can't help thinking it's a bit morbid...'

'I don't care if top breeders do recommend it - I am not going to eat dog food!'

Posh dog views expensive food and wine.

'That's not exactly what I had in mind.'

"Could we have a doggy bag please?"

"Sure, you used to be a YouTube sensation. But what have you done lately."