Botanical Humor Fan Gifts

"I think I'll start with the fly soup."

"I wouldn't take the name 'dog strangling vine' literally."

Little Farm Shop of Horrors with G.M produce turned into man eating plant

The beautiful but deadly 'Venus dog trap'.

'I ask you, Larry the Landscaper, did you ever, under any circumstances, promise anyone a rose garden?'

Mushrooms of New York

"Where are the perineums?" "Aisle 3. Between the vaginas and the rectums."

"Yes, sir, it's Houstonia Michauxii and it prefers shade or semi-shade."

F&E Landscape Architects. Ground cover plants are the Peter Pan of landscape design. The never "grow up"!

"Psst...The grass is a plant!"

Adam and eve do their laundry,

'I've decided to go straight!'

"You know you've been acting really stuck-up ever. Since you got that stand."

"Don't worry, the pain will stop once everything goes numb."

"I think it's a Spider Plant bite."

Venus fly trap.

"Nature has a twisted sense of humor."

"I see you've laid out your garden."

Cactus Hold Up

"What seems to be the problem?"

'Honey have you seen my Viagra'

"It's a crank call - just heavy transpiration."

Bathing Flowers.

"Johnson, look at the lilies of the field. They neither spin nor toil. Fire them."

'I think you've talked it to death, dear.'

Plants and Flowers Crack Jokes.

Bro Miliads

Undignified Exits of the Plant World

"I thought you'd like it. It's an orchid. pre-neglected!"

'The bad news is, it didn't grow hair. The good news is, he's being featured in 'Better Homes and Gardens'.' (Quick Gro tub next to chair.)

"I warned him not to go vegan."

"It seems that a flower is just a weed in drag!"

"The hair growth formula didn't help Bob...so we're trying it in the garden!"

Belching plant

After you finish picking the poppies for opium, don't forget to save some seeds for my lemon muffins.