Biblical Tales Buff Gifts

Noah's Ark - Two hedgehogs get squashed by larger animals whilst leaving the ark.

'There are times, Noah, when I feel I don't know you at all.'

'We'll wait for the next one.'

'James, Simon, wake up... ...the Master is sleep-healing again.'

"Damn. I think I missed the turn for Bethlehem."

"I think I've figured out why we can't find the marina."

"The hyenas started it."

'Yes, all at once!'

"On the eighth day, God found a lot of assembly parts left over."

Church Library - Pop-Up Books

'Let's have some fun... give Eve extra memory.'

"How was I supposed to know that the apple was a controlled substance?"

'Luxury cruise you said!'

"Hang on, isn't this the second pair of zebras we've had today?"

'You were great at 'Daniel in the Lion's Den!' -- I'd sure like to hear you do 'The Three Little Pigs' sometime!'

"We have a potentially serious problem accruing on the poop deck."

Noah's life jacket demonstration

'Gosh, I dunno. You sure it's organic?'

Bible Bloopers

'It's not much of a soap opera with just that Adam guy.'

"Two of every known creature on the planet and you forgot the pooper-scooper?"

'Look man, no wings!'

'The ten commandments have all been reduced to tweets.'

Caption Contest TK

Moses unblocking the toilet.

'We're going to start this week's sermon with a review of the basics....'

'Don't worry it's organic...'

"Enough with the treehugging already!"

A vicar is reading 'The Great Begatsby' written by Abraham.

"Why, Vicar, I'm Eve in the Garden of Eden, surely..."

'Even More Disciples'

Snake in the grass...

"Now tell us, Davey, what kind of rock did you use?"

'I'll raise you, Lazarus...'

'Okay, Noah...I'm going to tell you again. Listen very carefully this time.'