Biblical Stories Lover Gifts

The plague of frogs begins

'Crowd control has never been easier since this Moses guy joined up.'

"I quite like the name, but I've been ordered to change it"

"I've got this awful feeling we took the wrong boat!"

'Goliath's Achilles Heel.'

'We're good with the loaves and fishes. But how about some white wine?'

"We have had a flood warning. But we' re just waiting for Michael Fish to confirm it."

"Do I look fat in this?"

"Well, it's either this or you hang out with that guy forever."

'I know an apple when I see one!'

'Now, let me get this straight -- You got this blonde hair on your shoulder by wrestling an angel?'

'Sire, Sodom and Gomorrah are requesting Federal disaster relief aid.'

"Congratulations, Trumpism. It's ot often we initiate a new horseman."

"I've told you before one at each end!"

Church Library - Pop-Up Books

"Hang on, isn't this the second pair of zebras we've had today?"

'You say the ARKS are NOT two by two?'

"Maybe you should go make sure we're in the right line."

"If this Goliath bloke is as big as they say, I can just hang around the forest until he's gone."

'Tell us the story of Moses again -- I like the chase scene!'

"And maybe throw in a talking snake to make sure they don't take it literally."

". . . I called this meeting to communicate that I had dinner Noah..."

Little Known Moments In History

'Hello Colin, I'm Arthur, any idea what all the fuss is about?'

"The fourth horseman says that he will be late. He hasn't left the Old Testament yet."

'Why did Moses wander in the desert for forty years?'

Jesus is Scourged (The Holy Bible).

'Not only will you know everything but I'll see that you get your own talk show.'

'You brought gold? I thought we agreed to a twenty dollar limit?'

Regifts of the Magi

"I can never remember if it's smite or smote."

'Noah, before you leave we'd like to have a word with you!'

''Tree of Knowledge,' eh? - Has it been fact-checked?'

BRAND-NEW OMG-STORY

Adam and Eve Arrested