Biblical Music Buff Gifts

Moses conducts the Red Sea orchestra.

"Yes. I said 2 by 2, but you needed to use 2 by 4s for the Ark...begin again."

"Here's another one written in E minor and in case you haven't guessed by now, it's the only chord I know."

"Samson was the best actor in the bible - he brought the house down!"

"I think I've figured out why we can't find the marina."

"Damn. I think I missed the turn for Bethlehem."

"The hyenas started it."

'Thou shalt not steal...except for bases.'

After 39 years, 11 months, 28 days, Moses finally received the GPS he ordered from Amazon.

'Yes, all at once!'

"That is an outrageous slur."

"On the eighth day, God found a lot of assembly parts left over."

"Could you all please pay attention while I go through the emergency procedure. . ."

TSA Noah

I'm not saying I'm not a hound dog. I'm saying I'm not nothing but a hound dog.

'Luxury cruise you said!'

"Today, I'll be cherry-picking from Deuteronomy."

'She sounds like your mother when you told her that you were going to marry me.'

"How was I supposed to know that the apple was a controlled substance?"

'Are we there yet?'

Wolfgang Amadeus Mozak.

'You were great at 'Daniel in the Lion's Den!' -- I'd sure like to hear you do 'The Three Little Pigs' sometime!'

Piano Keyboard

"We have a potentially serious problem accruing on the poop deck."

Noah's life jacket demonstration

'Gosh, I dunno. You sure it's organic?'

'It's not much of a soap opera with just that Adam guy.'

'Look man, no wings!'

Caption Contest TK

"Believe me it's only an apple."

Yo! Emmett Kelly raps! (with ringmaster flash)

Bible Bloopers

'The ten commandments have all been reduced to tweets.'

Moses unblocking the toilet.

'At least I don't have his life.'