Bathroom Philosopher Gifts

"I just need a few minutes with the auto-sensor to regain my illusion of control."

Damn, I've forgotten why I came in here.

'I take a cold shower every morning... right after my daughters have taken hot ones.'

His & Hers Towels

"I swear it - I've seem them, no digging - no covering just Bawoosh!"

'Are you alright?' - 'Yes.' - 'I want a bath. What are you doing in there?' - 'Multi-tasking.'

Everyone has a good novel inside them.

'I get my best ideas in the bathroom.'

"It's me, darling, we're out of toilet paper."

Man with typewriter on toilet.

'In the event you suffer from Montezuma's Revenge, there's a TV in every bathroom.'

'What in hell kind of a men's room is this?'

You do realize he writes half his material on the toilet!

Moses parting his hair.

Bathroom Fashion

I guess Grandpa was once a wise king, too. He always says he does his best thinking on the throne.

"Think of it not just as an upgrade to your bathroom, but as a metaphor for life."

'I know it's a bit unusual, but that's where he gets all the best ideas.'

Prehistoric Graffito

Honey, this stuff is for dental health, not mental health.

'Male version of aromatherapy'

'It's been a rough day, my shirt button fell off, the handle of my brief case came off... I'm too scared to go to the bathroom!'

Eureka!

'I. Am. So. Embarrassed! How long have I been sitting across from him with that stuck in my teeth?'

Mr Meier calendar

There's more and more reality TV. . . How about a night with George.

'What happens when a body is immersed in hot water?'

"Hydro density appartus invention? Go away - I'm not disturbing his bath for that!"

"I've been having stomach problems. I sit on the bathroom for 30 minutes in the morning...and a half-hour in the evening."

"I am better than this. I should have been an artist's sketchbook!"

"If nothing else the lock down has allowed us to spend quality time together!!"

A man goes to the toilet and loses weight in the process.

Nature is not perfect

If toilets could talk

Wash hand before making sound of one hand clapping.