Bathroom Diva Gifts

Singing is everyone's shower rights.

My strawberry cleansing cream, sesame oil skin moisturizer and goat's milk soap have ruined my diet.

Domestic Superheroes!!

"Together ideas for couples" "Slap a sandwich together" "Put two and two together" "Pull themselves together" "Rub two sticks together" "Try to hold it together" "String a phrase together"

"Someone once told me that kids grow up so quickly. I hope there's some truth to that."

"Better bring me another cookie. The last one fell in the water."

"In my house, 'dirty dancing' means it's time to mop the floor."

'Honey, where's my cell phone?'

"Honey, do these sweatpants make me look like I prefer we stay in tonight so I can watch the game?"

Shampoo.

Housewife feeding her washing machine with a brief.

'Congratulations, dear! Your home cooked dinner was so good you'd think it was an expensive frozen entree!'

Balancing work and family

Things my vacuum likes to suck up

'Will you be long, fixing this leak? I'll have to put my Bert's dinner on in ten minutes.'

"I had to skip my workout."

Ironing day.

'Your house is spotless, your children are well behaved and dinner was delicious. How do you do it?'

'Sure, I'm a working mother - is there any other kind?'

'That's her second pitcher and she doesn't even like beer - I guess she just likes to pee.'

'Your CV says in your last job you were responsible for...'

'It's labour-saving because with this you'll be able to burn my meals much faster!'

'We just invented cooking yesterday, and already she's serving leftovers!'

Woman has 3 towels in her restroom: 'Mine', 'Mine' and 'Mine'.

Washing Line Walker

"How much?! Blimey, to get my money's worth, I'd need to use it EVERY WEEK!"

"John, wake up, I think the mattress has stopped breathing."

'Honey, I'm home - for good.'

Couple who have confused their baby's pram and the lawn mower.

Looks Like They're Finally Renovating The Toilet

Love conquers all, except plaque.

'Will I have to be a mum when I grow up?'

Stone Age women were less happy than men at the arrival of the iron age: Look what I've invented just for you darling.

The household cavalry

Whittler's Mother.