Athletic Skills Humorist Gifts

'Whats his game?' - 'Oh! He used to be a goalkeeper.'

"Don't worry, Ref, just shock, it's his first save all season."

'These goalscoring celebrations are getting out of hand.'

Punt Cake

Football Chameleon

'I don't understand why you always put me in goal?!'

"How should we divide the teams?"

Bobby's pitching coach told him to put some stank on the ball.

Alternative fielding positions

'He's got abdominal pain, dizziness and soreness in his extremities. I'll know more when I see X-rays...'

Old snowboarder with a zimmerboard.

Trojan Hurdler.

"So what's this special distracting tactic you've developed?"

Carrot in front of the donkey workout.

"Whaddya want for nineteen mil?"

'Sean Connery was the best James Bond!'

'We went generic. The players' salaries are affordable.'

'I got a reverse hat trick. I let three goals in.'

'Why do they call him Neckline Ned.' - 'He's always plunging down the middle but never showing anything.'

'I reckon we need a new sweeper.'

Squash Courts - "Insurance anyone"

'It looks suspiciously like Killer Hart is taking a dive!'

'Looks like Shelia has overdone it with the cream scones this week!'

Small country advertisng at the Olympics

Various men worshipping a statue of a football

'He migrates through every year about this time. Just sits there and watches. We leave him alone and he leaves us alone...'

Trapped on the Pole Vault.

Pigs form huddles before taking up starting positions

'He's definitely heading for a red card.'