Armed Forces Humor Gifts

'Look behind you. . . Just kidding.'

Frank moonlights as a Grill Sergeant.

Cat in a tank...

Burmese pythons discussing a complete invasion.

"No, you dismantle your nuclear arsenal first."

'At ease, soldier.'

After defeating terror, George and his friends declare war on mild irritation and clouds.

A military officer sits at his desk with desk trays marked 'Search' and 'Destroy.'

Royal Bear Force - "Honey at 10 o'clock."

'Who said the Germans don't have a sense of humour? Just look at that card Hans Greber and we have haven't been shot at all day.'

French Army knife

'...and this is the Mess.'

"Did you call for a Medic?"

'Does my bum look big in this?'

"Let's see, this one is cherry flavored, I think this one is blueberry ..."

'Me? Morale Officer? --Why do you always pick on ME?'

'At last! Some decent kit.'

Tank driver wielding a slingshot.

"You can let that go till later, Harris."

'M.O.D. find budget replacement for the Fleet Air arm.'

Your Country Needs MOO!

'Well done troops: Spring is over, we can have a break now...'

Banting in the Yeomanry

At a Country House

'It's been five years since leaving Iraq and I'm still getting the sand out my ears.'

Ad Valorem

"Sir, the platoon suffered heavy casualties from a roadside IUD."

'THINGMY ON THE PORT BOW!! You know, what's it called? Long and pointy... Very fast... TORPEDO ON THE PORT BOW!!'

'It's only a slug Norman.'

"Whoever made fun of my hat better step forward now, or I'll turn this march around!"

The Bengal Lancers/Bingo Lancers/Bagel Lancers/Bungle Lancers

"Bad news Darling, I'm going to be posted abroad"

The Emperor of Irony

'I know you didn't just reach through the torpedo tube and grab those fish.'

'Hamster Swat Team.'