Military Humor Fans Gifts

Servicemen holding American flag. Sergeant says 'Good news, men, we'll be getting the new flagpole tomorrow.'

'When I ordered you to clean the john with a toothbrush, I didn't mean an electric one!'

'This is one place in the army where you have to hurry to and they don't keep you waiting!'

'General practitoner'

Frank moonlights as a Grill Sergeant.

Cat in a tank...

"No, you dismantle your nuclear arsenal first."

'At ease, soldier.'

A military officer sits at his desk with desk trays marked 'Search' and 'Destroy.'

Royal Bear Force - "Honey at 10 o'clock."

'Who said the Germans don't have a sense of humour? Just look at that card Hans Greber and we have haven't been shot at all day.'

'Does my bum look big in this?'

French Army knife

'...and this is the Mess.'

"Did you call for a Medic?"

'At last! Some decent kit.'

Tank driver wielding a slingshot.

"You can let that go till later, Harris."

'M.O.D. find budget replacement for the Fleet Air arm.'

'Me? Morale Officer? --Why do you always pick on ME?'

Your Country Needs MOO!

'It's been five years since leaving Iraq and I'm still getting the sand out my ears.'

'Well done troops: Spring is over, we can have a break now...'

At a Country House

Banting in the Yeomanry

Ad Valorem

"Sir, the platoon suffered heavy casualties from a roadside IUD."

'THINGMY ON THE PORT BOW!! You know, what's it called? Long and pointy... Very fast... TORPEDO ON THE PORT BOW!!'

'It's only a slug Norman.'

Beware of the dog.

The Bengal Lancers/Bingo Lancers/Bagel Lancers/Bungle Lancers

'Thank you colonel we'll keep your strategy in mind.'

"Bad news Darling, I'm going to be posted abroad"

The Emperor of Irony

My army drill instructors license plate is HUP-2-3-4.