Arena Adventurer Gifts

Arena. Game tonight. I'm thankful life is not a game. I like being in win-win situations.

'I hired a local guide. He knows every square inch of this stadium...'

'Whe they said 'God is my Judge', I didn't realize He was a real attorney.'

No caption (A young bald eagle plays a claw game full of fish as his parent stands behind him).

'Before you can enter, you need to punch in the verification code so we can be certain that you're a real soul,'

"Just one more question before I let you in...I can let you in...are you a cat or dog person?"

"Needs to get a life"

Hang on...I've got WINGS..!!!

"I've told you before one at each end!"

"If you get to the pitchfork-shaped cloud, you've gone too far."

A surprise in heaven

"I do tech support for the cloud."

Medieval Vacation: 'What? I am relaxed. I'm relaxing!'

". . . I called this meeting to communicate that I had dinner Noah..."

'This is my kind of place. You knock bottles off a table with a baseball and get a prize instead of time-out!'

Robotics. He's programmed to play video games all day long. Planned adolescence!

"Is this what I want to be doing with my death?"

I used to love coming here. Nudist beach.

Otto the SmartyCar!

"Finally, Miss Big-Shot calls her dead mother!"

"Will you stop telling me to feed the Zebras? We just ate the zebras!"

"Oh, no! We've inadvertently gobbled up our own parent company."

Halo Frisbee.

Saint Peter will sometimes put on a disguise just to play a prank on the new arrivals.

'I love the mountains and all, but I simply can't do this....I'm just too chicken.'

'This is way better than a litter box.'

"Shankar, I needed someone to dot the 'I's' and cross the 'T's' but that was before there was ChatGPT."

"I'm pretty sure my self-driving car is moonlighting for Uber behind my back."

"Trust me, I'm a robot."

'You sloth and gluttony guys have it easy -- I'm here for envy!'

"That's Bob. He's a bit of a wing nut."

Free ticket to heaven... details inside

"Your long-range investments would have made you a very wealthy man."

"Turn on the news." "I will not comply." "My analysis of your viewing patterns has determined you will grow depressed after the lead story." "There is a 95% probability you will then gorge yourself on rocky road ice cream and then stay up all night googling elliptical machines and diet pills." "Who told you this?" "Both your refrigerator and your browser are gossipy."

"I told you to pack a damned sweater."