Ancient Civilizations Fan Gifts

Ancient Greek setting. Man at desk writing on scroll says: 'Yes, they're draconian measures ??" but then, I am Draco.'

'Granted it's not as spectacular as a pyramid but it saves an awful lot of money.'

Rising damp's not a problem.

Worship 10 A.M.

"Ezra, we're so screwed..."

'Arson before the invention of fire'

Ancient Egyptian eye tests.

"'Leave Egypt'? And lose our security deposit?"

"Great news gentlemen! I have invented a tool to increase productivity..."

Please Help!

"It looks like they had too many Chiefs, and not enough Indians."

The Surprising Job of a Museum Cleaner

The little-known Mayan joke-a-day desk calendar.

It's a one up, 3,627 down

'I knew I shouldn't have come. That Maximus, throws the worst orgies!'

20 Years Later The First Pyramid Would Be Built, And Cheerleading Finales Would Never Be The Same.

Pyramids exploding.

'It seems a lot of trouble to go through just to sharpen a razor blade.'

'I fully support your goals, but I can't condone your methods.'

Gladiator area - 'And if you win this one you get to go into the play-offs against a lion.'

"Is it millenium compliant?"

The tomb of Ontap the Imiber.

'Ping-Pong in the stone age.'

Great. We have ants.

Mayan Calendar Co. Going out of business. Don't take it so hard, Ernie. It's not the end of the world.

"Sadie, I just heard they discovered lots of ancient cities buried hundreds of years ago in the jungles of cambodia."

Sadie, I just saw that the "great flood" myths are based on reality. You "saw"? On Youtube. It was a video called "The Advanced Pre Ice Age Civilizations that Vanished from Earth." The guy pointed out that the last ice age ended 12,000-ish years ago. And when it ended, huge ice caps that were two miles deep melted and flooded much of the world. And then he laid out a bunch of other evidence having to do with maps and artifacts and something or other. "Something or other"? Well, yeah, at around t

Atlantis Plumbing. Well, something's up! That's the tenth flooded basement call I've been on today!

Before the Fall

'It's an extinction notice.'

'Shoot, this is nothing, you should have seen how good we had it back in ancient Egypt.'

"We're having one heck of a time building that trapezoidal thing of yours..."

'Evidently, one of them was a cartoonist!'

'But this is fantastic, professor! It's like no language I've ever seen before!'

Hey, dad, do you think we could play something besides "catch"?