Yuletide Joker Pillows

'Cards don't send greetings, people send greetings.'

"I hacked into Santa's computer to make sure we're on his 'nice' list."

Night of the Latkes

"I'm sorry, but my costs were way out of control."

'Hang on a second, I think I have a sand castle in my shoe.'

Little girl hoses down walkway as Santa slips and falls

Batman's Baby

A Snowman falls down drunk outside a bar.

Well, she certainly is one of our more positive employees!

"A little under done?"

It's not what's outside that interests me. It's what's inside!

"Maybe we should just let heaven and nature sing."

"Everytime you touch me, I get frostbite!"

Snowman Driver

Christmas tree exchange

'Those aren't sprinkles! they're FLEAS!!!! 'I made it from scratch.'

Ice-Cube-IV

"The other reindeer sent me back to the smoking section."

'I hate it when he's in one of his silly festive moods.'

Santa Elevator

Santa Claws...

'If you ask me, toys are getting far too realistic!'

"You were ho-ho-hoing in your sleep again!"

'What do you expect? A red bulb burned out, and you're free till Christmas.'

"Come on guys, my jokes aren't that bad!"

'Since when does Shamrocks give you an itchy rash?'

"First of all, this conversation never happened."

'It's self cleaning, and runs on natural gas.'

Hoo Hoo Hoo Merry Christmas!

Centaur becomes pantomime horse

"I hate waiting! I know! I'll set this clock back an hour, and then in an hour...I'll move it forward, and 60 minutes will go by in a flash! Of course, we'll have to do this 176 more times."

'They think I can walk on water.'

"The kids told me it was a magic wand."

'He's disappointed with the Queen's card - he wanted a rude one!'

"I finished my holiday shopping. I'm re-gifting presents I received last year."