Holiday Jokers Pillows

A Shadow Over Groundhog Day...

Santa with 'naughty' and 'nice' in-trays.

'I'm facing unemployment! The world is runnin out of nice kids!'

'Now go to sleep or Santa won't come. Or if he does come, it'll be just to give you a wedgie.'

No Presents Until Christmas Day

"You were ho-ho-hoing in your sleep again!"

"Christmas - what a fuss eh?"

Gracie goes to get cookies for Santa, but Papi has eaten them all.

'Why couldn't you just give him a bucket and shovel?'

Claus 2.0

"One more time, Mr Claus - who sold you the data?"

'Looks like someone beat us to the punch.'

#Thanksgiving #Nofilter

Night of the Latkes

High security Santa's grotto

"You do realize his ‘nose so bright’ is going to attract a horde of Defense Department drones."

Christmas in the Fish Bowl

'You and your 'Rescue the Reindeer' campaign!'

Van Gogh was starting to run out of gift ideas.

That one has all the batteries!

Hiding the electronics.

"I'm sorry, but my costs were way out of control."

Frozen Turkey: "I hate to bother you on a holiday but I'm freezing out here. Do you have a heated enclosed space I could rest inside for four to five hours?"

"Ninja bread men"

"We don't care about his nose. We won't let him play because he's not vaccinated and won't wear a mask!"

"A GPS! Thanks guys! It's exactly what I need to guide my sleigh...you know, in light of that unfortunate hunting accident."

Books: The Wit and Wisdom of Ebenezer Scrooge

"I don't think the turkey's going to be done on time. That's the dishwasher."

'I was an egg in the Easter play.'

'This vacation, let's go on something OTHER than a power trip.'

"How about if we just winter in hell?"

Non-Denominational Carols

Mrs Claus - North Pole Dancing.

Fish snorkling above water.

'Now it fits.'