Young Theologians Gifts

"Does God have his own Web site so I could e-mail my prayers to him?"

"If a third grader knows the answer, how much of a problem can it really be?"

Boy and girl at thier studies

"That's Brian Eggleston, de facto leader of the playground intelligentsia."

Multi-Generational Books

"So, what do you do for play?"

"Sure - After the aggressive guys wear it all out!"

"You know what happens when you make good grades? They send you to another school called college."

'I made a good grade in creative writing, but I didn't do very well in creative spelling.'

'I'd like to challenge the test.'

"You think two weeks in isolation is hard?"

'I want to chuck all the spelling and math and just get back to playing with blocks.'

'How much stuff can I get away with and still go to heaven?'

'Wow! School's only been out for ten minutes, and I've already forgotten everything I learned.'

'Yeah, bit how does the stork get into the maternity room?'

A likely story - lost his waterskis in a poker game !

'Tommy's book reports are like no other.'

"Finally...school starts next week."

'It was bound to happen - they're beginning to think like binary computers.'

"Daddy, instead of the princess story tonight, can you explain how and why manifest destiny eliminated the American Indians?"

"If everything is God's will, tell me again why I need to study for exams?"

"In pre-school I was an overachiever. Now, in first grade, math is threatening my reputation."

"This is my last day. My parents found a more expensive school on the East Side."

'All dogs have 4 legs. Tabby has 4 legs. But I'm just a kid, so I don't have to think logically.'

'Could you carve the Commandments in stone? -- otherwise they'll think I made them up.'

'Let your people go? - after all the trouble I went to getting them full employment?'

"But, Jesus - you can't become an atheist."

The truth about the expulsion from paradise. . .

Adam and Eve Arrested

'Number three?', 'This is NOT a quiz!'

"Reverend, if we're born again in Jesus...do we get another belly button?"

"'Thou shalt give good discounts'? That's a commandment?"