Witty Gifters Pillows

'He must be the real Santa... He was the only sober guy at the Xmas party!'

Some cars need a backseat steering wheel.

Three card brag - I'm great! I'm really handsome & I'm very rich.

'The worst thing about it is I'm claustrophobic.'

Santa 'Freezing' Claus.

How the gift registry should really work

"And another thing, it's real cool in the summer!"

Bagel problems.

A sheep, a humming bird and a beetle - 'Baa, hum, bug'

House Broken.

'I handed over my company to my son and he's doing better than I ever did. Unfortunately he's starting school next year...'

'I've got one of those wobbly forwards trolleys!'

Sudoku toilet paper

"You don't think rum-filled centers would give his officers the wrong impression?"

'He's not leaving, but if we collect enough, he might.'

"And if anything goes wrong I'd like to donate my body to comedy."

Acme Coffee Co.

"I hope you've come home with something for your wind."

Hand Sanitiser in the Middle of the Ocean

"Seriously? Earrings again? How much thought do you actually put into buying me presents?"

"How much of a gratuity does Santa usually get?"

Christmas postie!

"Mouse, mouse, mouse, mouse, mouse, mouse, mouse, mouse, mouse."

A panhandler with a sign that reads "If not me, who? If not now, when?"

Man with an umbrella hat looks at man with a hat umbrella.

Ockham chooses a razor

"We don't need proof of each delivery."

'I should have told you about the side effects. Anyway, I think it looks really good small.'

'I just feel so much better buying the free range Pinatas.'

'You didn't chew, did you ?!'

"You wouldn't believe how much it costs to feed eight tiny reindeer."

The art of regifting

"Good Grief! He thinks he is Santa Claus!"