Witty Gifters Pillows

'He must be the real Santa... He was the only sober guy at the Xmas party!'

Some cars need a backseat steering wheel.

Three card brag - I'm great! I'm really handsome & I'm very rich.

'The worst thing about it is I'm claustrophobic.'

Santa 'Freezing' Claus.

"And another thing, it's real cool in the summer!"

How the gift registry should really work

Bagel problems.

A sheep, a humming bird and a beetle - 'Baa, hum, bug'

'I handed over my company to my son and he's doing better than I ever did. Unfortunately he's starting school next year...'

House Broken.

'I've got one of those wobbly forwards trolleys!'

Sudoku toilet paper

"You don't think rum-filled centers would give his officers the wrong impression?"

'He's not leaving, but if we collect enough, he might.'

An Anarchist's Christmas

Acme Coffee Co.

"And if anything goes wrong I'd like to donate my body to comedy."

Hand Sanitiser in the Middle of the Ocean

"Seriously? Earrings again? How much thought do you actually put into buying me presents?"

"I hope you've come home with something for your wind."

Christmas postie!

"How much of a gratuity does Santa usually get?"

'I should have told you about the side effects. Anyway, I think it looks really good small.'

"Well? Try them out!"

"We don't need proof of each delivery."

Ockham chooses a razor

"Mouse, mouse, mouse, mouse, mouse, mouse, mouse, mouse, mouse."

Man with an umbrella hat looks at man with a hat umbrella.

A panhandler with a sign that reads "If not me, who? If not now, when?"

'I just feel so much better buying the free range Pinatas.'

'You didn't chew, did you ?!'

The art of regifting

"You wouldn't believe how much it costs to feed eight tiny reindeer."

Snow Stab.