Witty Advocate Gifts

Leonard L. Lipchitz: Sending the Law since 1972

"HR-bill 9495. Cutting down non-profits."

'Think how all that chatting is affecting global warming.'

"Touché"

Prejudice/Empathy

"What Genocide? What Armenians?"

'What'll it be?'

'Oh, and one more thing

Horace Mann

'I told him we're becoming an endangered species. He just laughed.'

'I haven't been campaigning for a creche all these years for nothing - you're going!'

'Finishing law school was easy compared to finding an office.'

"Actually the salary isn't important. . . I just need a desk to rest my feet on."

'I'm having trouble with drinking. . . I'm getting Arthritis in my elbow.'

"It's not just the church that needs evangelists. So does big oil."

"Mr. Berkowitz, I and my Jewish career counselor, hereby wish you a mazel tov on your birthday."

Inequality Protests

"I'm sorry, but you're not the patient your father was."

'What's a knee like yours doing in a joint like this?'

Gay and lesbian support group.

"He can't stop digressing."

'I swear, one of these days I'm going to win one!'

"You're one of the most twisted people I know!"

Young Girl: 'Oh YEAH?! Well my Mum's Toy Boy is YOUNGER than YOUR Mum's!'

What To Do About Homelessness

Milk is for wimps.

True Believer

"I'm an athlete the way Buzzy here is an apex predator."

'I'm doing my bit to develop a global response as part of Fonterra's infant formula risk management strategy.'

Lanard, Bonwell, Wilson & Brockman: Based on the standup comedy of Steve Lanard

'Play ball!' 'What, no foreplay?'

'Please try to be more tactful with your co-workers...' 'Tact is for people who aren't witty enough to be sarcastic...'

'I'm afraid your Unique Selling Point isn't pointy enough.'

'When you flippantly asked them to honour your August holiday arrangements they flippantly honoured August 2022.'

Is my mother-in-law the only one who shows up with an attache case?