Wilderness Wizard Gifts

"At first I was homesick....now I'll probably be campsick for awhile!"

"Ahhh... close enough."

'Are you sure that's the right map?'

'I want to visit the very EDGE of civilisation, to explore the BRUTAL shores of natures most REMOTE regions. If you could manage that with a five star hotel and first class travel it would be perfect.'

Support Group for a Good Problem

"I dunno, looks like a trap."

Plants Cheer as They Get Watered.

Sausages.

Boy rolled into a snowball

I hate deer! What do you have to repel them? They're awful. I've got fences. Sprays. Decoys. Tree's Tree Nursery. I'll takes these. Anything to get rid of the varmints. Ring him up, Twig. I don't know why you are so down on deer. They've been very good to you! Anti-deer.

'I'm going to drag my sled up and down the sidewalk until the noise drives nature crazy and it snows.'

Deer Season Open.

'We might make more progress if we try working as a team.'

Sport Utility Boot.

"Looks like those folks from 'civilization' are back!"

"Oh, honey, look! Just under that candy bar wrapper, next to the empty Bud Light can and to the left of the plastic bag... a salamander!"

'Oh, I'm not a guru -- I'm just big on personal space.'

"All right, boys, we're had our fun."

Toivola Jones and the Search For Spring.

"Frank and Sheila finally get off the beaten path."

"Day 4,261... I don’t know how much longer I can survive. Still no signs of civilization. Food is scarce and I fear the wound on my ankle is infected. Still, all this pales in comparison to the horror of having to be anywhere at any particular time."

"And that's when the therapist suggested… exposure therapy!"

'Congratulations! Our yard's been declared a national wilderness area!'

Fred's Canadian caribou hunt goes from bad to worse.

D.I.Y

',,,And we'd really like a heart for the Tin Man,,,'

'Look what I've got, Dad - Can I keep it?'

'You can't come in here with that.'

Desert Island Mishap

"Come on in. The water’s fine!" "Hmm! What’s wrong with this picture?!"

"So long, boys. I'm off to the big city to try my hand at chainsaw sculpture."

"Yaffle Pass Elevation 11,990 ft Continental Divide"

'I love the mountains and all, but I simply can't do this....I'm just too chicken.'

"I was hoping summer camp would be more ... campy."

"I don't care what anybody says, coffee just tastes better in a tree stand. . ."