Wilderness Humorist Gifts

"I think he wants us to keep the noise down!"

"We're doomed for sure, Ed. I can't find a bill-changer ANYWHERE!"

"My dad says we eat honey 'cause it has lots of vitamin Bee."

Man painting over a 'You are here' sign.

Skiing.

"You're very lucky that gazelle gives me diarrhea."

"Yes, they're hair extensions, but you have to agree, I look fabulous..."

'Go on, Andy, it's high time anteaters learned size isn't everything!'

"Happy Gnu Year!"

Deer Season Open.

'Darling - I think it's time to stop feeding the birds.'

"Eat me"

"Too much concealer?"

Try me/try me/try me...

"I see by your resume this would be your first time in a symbiotic relationship."

Yet another law of the jungle: 'Absolutely NO howling at the moon after 11 PM!

'Whup - giant anaconda about to attack - quick Peg, hand me something to take care of it with.'

"Just because we're hyenas doesn't mean we always have to get Laughing Cow cheese."

Grizzly bears are gregarious animals.

While old, sick, and weak animals remained targets, the lions most enjoyed culling the herd of its sarcastic teenagers.

'That's one hell of a cat-flap Harry. You must have a big cat, heh, heh.'

Burmese pythons discussing a complete invasion.

Irritable trowel syndrome.

"Hey, welcome to the Catskills. Anyone here from New Jersey?"

I told you we were late!

"Oh no. Is that my ex?"

"Jeepers, I didn't know anything could gets so hot!"

"Get out of my face!"

'I hate to say I told you so, Larry, but that's why you check your car for bears before you put on your seatbelt.'

"...and she said 'MOO!'"

Happy birthday Dung Beetle

'Pray for me.'

"Did you just do a rooster?"

"I'm fascinated by body language."

'We have Vanilla, Chocolate and Strawberry on your choice of Cedar, Oak or Elm cone...'