Wild West Humorist Gifts

'... But I thought you said to get a long, little doggie, boss.'

"Face it, Earl. We're dogfoodboys."

"Which of you is 'Cactus Jack'?"

'I'm turning in. Cover me.'

'Buck, the town's bein' attacked by tin cans! Sheriff's looking' all over for ya.'

"Give him time, - if anyone can break that swing set, it's O'l Tex."

"Do you think there's intellegent life in there?"

Dang! My shorts are riding up on me again!

"Hey, welcome to the Catskills. Anyone here from New Jersey?"

"Sorry I'm late! The driving conditions are awful!"

'I was fixin' to fill you full o' lead, Clanton, but it looks like that there stalactite done the job for me!'

"Fire one shot if you find a waterhole or two for a coffeeshop."

'Well, so much for our legendary ability to eviscerate cattle with surgical precision...'

(Maps to the Homes of the Steers) (Maps $ 100)

'Ok, so we agree that we're going to throw them into the cactus.'

Nun fight at the OK Corral.

Cattlemans Saloon.

"Perhaps it would be easier using mice?"

'I guess everything's okay, doc, two legs is showing, one out of each hole."

I've been doing sit-ups!

"Daisy had twin bull calves. How'd you do?"

"Giddyup."

"I don't care what the job pays. . . I'm never herding cats again!"

'It's easy to follow the No Deodorant Kid.'

TV Guide: Cowboy Cowboys.

A cow's bedside table.

Wanted for Stick Up

"Nothing like a snow zombie."

That's one harmonious butt hole!

'Marriage is okay, I guess, but I sure will be glad when my wife learns not to starch my jeans.'

'Serves me right for frowning.'

'I'm afraid to a horse a carrot is just a carrot!'

"Yes, I can help you with your loan questions. I'm the loan arranger."

A cowboy on a computer receiving his 'gee gee mail'

I'm a Smart-Cow!