Outdoorsy Comedian Gifts

"Banning hunting isn't good enough, we want trauma councelling as well."

"I said the males were 'evolving' – I didn't say they were 'maturing.'"

"...and what really makes this story scary is the kittens got lost in the woods before flea and tick products were invented."

Skiing.

'If Earwigs looked like baby seals:'

'Hang on a minute: What does 'IVF' mean?!'

'Now Featuring Gas-Fired Microwave Campfires!'

Irritable trowel syndrome.

"Hey, welcome to the Catskills. Anyone here from New Jersey?"

'I hate to say I told you so, Larry, but that's why you check your car for bears before you put on your seatbelt.'

Penguin

'I thought that 'remote gizmo' was just for manoeuvring the caravan down the drive!'

Mr Briggs's Pleasures of Fishing - No. IX

"Well if it comes to that you're not exactly Mr Wonderful."

'You sure complain a lot for someone who says he loves nature.'

Pop Top Ice FIshing

Mountain climbers, "Someone's been here before us."

'And I thought I had a big egg to lay.'

Bird Symbol Hunting

'Aren't these marshmallows just going to make us plumper for when the bears ultimately eat us?'

Jim Morrison Goes Camping

"Only 150 kids? - Have you considered fertility treatment?"

'I do enjoy the winter olympics.'

"I see you have extensive wood chuckery experience."

'Clayton enjoys living on the edge,'

"Have you farted. . . ?"

"Geez, Dude. I asked for a slight trim. Not a Brazilian wax."

"Wow! That's an amazing welding project!"

"Perhaps I should have warned you...They really don't like wholemeal bread."

'Does the hunter I just ate make me look fat?'

"Any duck that thinks that decoy looks like a duck,swims like a duck and sounds like a duck, deserves to be shot!"

'...And if that doesn't work, grab your rifle and start blasting away.'

"It all comes down to the aging and fermentation process."

'If a bear attacks and I have to play dead I want it to be as convincing as possible!'

Alligator Bars