Humorist Outdoorsman Gifts

And now sit back and enjoy nature as you've not seen it before...

"Psst. . .he's not even looking up here....keep real still and he'll never notice us!"

Man painting over a 'You are here' sign.

Skiing.

Irritable trowel syndrome.

"Well if it comes to that you're not exactly Mr Wonderful."

Bird Symbol Hunting

Mountain climbers, "Someone's been here before us."

'Aren't these marshmallows just going to make us plumper for when the bears ultimately eat us?'

Pop Top Ice FIshing

"If the meeting goes on for longer than scheuled...I'm prepared!"

'You sure complain a lot for someone who says he loves nature.'

Your five o'clock shadow is showing, Mike.

"Only 150 kids? - Have you considered fertility treatment?"

LOOK BHIND U!

'I do enjoy the winter olympics.'

'Clayton enjoys living on the edge,'

"Why do people talk about a rat's nest like it's a bad thing?"

"Perhaps I should have warned you...They really don't like wholemeal bread."

"Have you farted. . . ?"

"Geez, Dude. I asked for a slight trim. Not a Brazilian wax."

Fork in the trail.

'...And if that doesn't work, grab your rifle and start blasting away.'

"Any duck that thinks that decoy looks like a duck,swims like a duck and sounds like a duck, deserves to be shot!"

"Yes, I'm the wise man who lives on the top of the mountain. And believe me, the surcharge for the pizza delivery service is insane!"

'If a bear attacks and I have to play dead I want it to be as convincing as possible!'

'If I've calculated correctly, I have two more birthdays before I never have to mow the lawn again.'

"Have you ever actually seen a chicken cross the road?"

Ranger has sign saying 'Do not feed the bears'. Bear crosses out sign to read 'Feed the bears'.

"Yes, I do know how to light a fire with two sticks... Provided one of them is a match."

'Look Dad - bigfoot!'

'It's going to be hard to get lost in these woods!'

"He's really not that scary, Teresa."

'Organically-grown popcorn? Give me a break!'

Fish Training