Wilderness Jokester Gifts

Squirrel chopping wooden leg of lumberjack.

"If you ask me, wearing these things only makes them nervous."

"Yes, they're hair extensions, but you have to agree, I look fabulous..."

"You're very lucky that gazelle gives me diarrhea."

"Oh my gosh, honey! Look out!"

"I see by your resume this would be your first time in a symbiotic relationship."

"Just because we're hyenas doesn't mean we always have to get Laughing Cow cheese."

'I'm telling you Fred, this can of silver paint is going to improve your love-life!...'

'Wow, Jimmy, that's pretty good!'

"Too much concealer?"

While old, sick, and weak animals remained targets, the lions most enjoyed culling the herd of its sarcastic teenagers.

'Whup - giant anaconda about to attack - quick Peg, hand me something to take care of it with.'

Burmese pythons discussing a complete invasion.

'I hate to say I told you so, Larry, but that's why you check your car for bears before you put on your seatbelt.'

"Oh no. Is that my ex?"

I fart more than that!

"Hey, welcome to the Catskills. Anyone here from New Jersey?"

'Pray for me.'

Snowman of the Apes

"Do you think the birds like me?"

'Well, I got a hunting license and a fishing license and by golly I'm going to use them.'

Inflatable Duck Boat

Giraffe Portrait

"Must get a longer cable."

'Apparently it's part of the evolutionary process!'

"You never laugh at my jokes... "

Crow and fox

'I wanted a change in decor.'

"Influence this."

'You know, after a long hard winter, I just HATE eating out of cans.'

'Can I have a Banana-Split' without the ice-cream?'

Clandestine cows.

Warning! Stay off the biotech lawn.

'Fancy a swift half?'

"Don't worry, it's not rabies: It's normal for me to foam at the mouth..."