Wanderlust Jokester Gifts

Airport Security.

'I'm telling you Fred, this can of silver paint is going to improve your love-life!...'

'Whup - giant anaconda about to attack - quick Peg, hand me something to take care of it with.'

I fart more than that!

Snowman of the Apes

'Well, I got a hunting license and a fishing license and by golly I'm going to use them.'

"Must get a longer cable."

"Influence this."

'Apparently it's part of the evolutionary process!'

'Can I have a Banana-Split' without the ice-cream?'

'Hey, Fred! You have a relative visiting.'

"Remember that ultimately we must answer to Chairs."

'Fancy a swift half?'

'So much for the 'Eye of the Tiger'.'

'Barry I think it's time you had your eyes checked!'

"My husband is fishing. . ."

Squirrel chopping wooden leg of lumberjack.

'The reports were right...he's using tools!'

'Todd don't be such a clown...'

"Apparently, I'm fun, but I'm no fun in bed."

You're Here. Man, You Really Look Like An Idiot!

The Principal of Inertia.

'If you cut back on children, at least try to eat them before they nibble on your house.'

"That's Gilbey's hat and Gilbey's binoculars, but that's definitely not Gilbey."

"Pff! That orang utan's obviously a crisis actor!"

"We both knew this day would come, Samantha... I'm leaving you and taking the kids."

"Boy, I get booed everytime I perform here."

I know you can't forget, but you should learn to forgive...

"Our special today? Hot wings!!"

"People are way too casual when they fly these days."

'I wouldn't call myself a vegetarian, but I don't eat dead animals either.'

'I'll remove the thorn as soon as you've signed the waiver form.'

"Stop right there, it's my stockbroker: I have to take this!"