Weekend Retreat Gifts

"Nope. I came here to relax and not check my messages."

Glastonbury. After.

'The ghost walks this passage every night Monday to Friday. He has weekends off.'

"Harry—Let's get brunch and day drink."

Steamed Room: "Man, I feel so much lighter."

"Think we'll still make happy hour?"

Teaching a Sunday school class didn't end the way John imagined.

'Are we there yet? Huh? Have we achieved Nirvana yet? Huh, have we?'

"He's declared it an area of natural beauty"

'I don't think that this whale is beached.'

"I'm going to tell them our number one way to be stress-free is taking a day off to go fishing."

Typical...the weather is lousy all week...then on the weekend it's too sunny to work.

"To think—this meeting, which turned into the perfect day, filled with spontaneous adventures that will become priceless memories, could have been an e-mail."

Vacation Time: Hither, Thither, Yon.

Gulliver's other travels.

"And this right here was our weekend in the Hamptons."

'The view is much better on the other side of the bus, we'll sit there on the way back.'

"So you want for your three wishes...world peace, happiness for friends and family...and the weekend off."

"Oh, God! I had EXACTLY the right amount to drink last night."

No early morning tea past this landing

"I don't mind you spending the weekend at the lake with the boys, but don't push your luck by bringing home fish."

If you're looking for a good time, you'll find it; if you can't find it, it will find you....

'It's your babysitter, where do you keep your fire extinguisher?'

Monk on the beach

"It says it's the vodka that's distilled twenty-nine times - they just can't seem to get it right."

Writer's Block Party

'You know, if we had a bed and breakfast, we could use it ourselves!'

Priest

'See what happens when meditation isn't supervised?'

Do-it-yourself. Do-it-yourself-with-good-friends-and-pizza-and-a-few-beers.

"It's either enlightenment or excruciating boredom."

"Carol, our guests are here, along with the complete L.L. Bean catalogue."

"It's from the Hendersons. They want us to come over this weekend."

"Now, before we go, does anyone have to empty their cache?"

'I told you that chicken wasn't cooked!'