Retreat Gifts

"No thanks, I need time away from madness."

'Today's Presentation: God's Miracles.'

'You know, if we had a bed and breakfast, we could use it ourselves!'

"Too crowded. Let's go."

Woman pouring perfume into her bath.

Steamed Room: "Man, I feel so much lighter."

Teaching a Sunday school class didn't end the way John imagined.

"I'm going to tell them our number one way to be stress-free is taking a day off to go fishing."

Scurile travels

"To think—this meeting, which turned into the perfect day, filled with spontaneous adventures that will become priceless memories, could have been an e-mail."

"I'm going on a retreat."

Monk on the beach

"It's either enlightenment or excruciating boredom."

Priest

"That's it sorted then - this year we'll spend a fortnight in the spare bedroom."

'Lost in the Jungle I found this Buddhist retreat...'

Business acquaintances on holiday

Excess Baggage: Some people take getting away from it all very seriously.

Spring Training

"Prayer does work! I wasn't picked for any of the church committees."

'Dad, have you ever thought about retiring and going in for volunteer work?'

"I don't think there's enough vodka for another week in Canada."

"Fred, no one is going to bother you here. Put away the Bare Spray."

"Tuesday is my day off - leave a message..."

"For quality control purposes, this phone call may be recorded and replayed for laughs at various office parties throughout our company."

Go away

'Mother, are you sure your marijuana use is purely medicinal?'

''Fasting' doesn't mean eating fast food!'

Ocean sounds $1.00

"He used to be in advertising"

'It's SUPPOSED to be quiet up here!'

'It was a long trip, but the french fries are worth it.'

"Can I see your license Sir?"