Weekend Gathering Gifts

'I told you that chicken wasn't cooked!'

"It's Sunday, and I'm Brunch!"

Do-it-yourself. Do-it-yourself-with-good-friends-and-pizza-and-a-few-beers.

If you're looking for a good time, you'll find it; if you can't find it, it will find you....

'I had ten pints last night. That's the last time I drink rum during the week.'

'Uh oh, looks like we've got weekend guests.'

'Darling. Let's get the Gustavssons over this weekend for some more bare knuckle boxing.'

'There was a power failure today - we're having steak, fish, chicken, hamburger, turkey, and pork chops for dinner.'

'You and your beer parties!'

'That very mild cheese was butter.'

"This place has the best happy hour."

I could have danced all night!

"I invited a few friends over who think you should see a psychiatrist."

'I can't force jocose if I'm not feeling it.'

"First I drink, then I barbecue — that's my secret."

Can I give you a slice of the action?

"She wanted to go to the beach. I wanted to golf."

"You two seem oddly suited."

"That table is yours once that party decides to move to the suburbs."

Corner Bakery ... Bread and Breakfast.

Clubbing

"There! Isn't sipping my Tropical Surprise more fun than arguing over some ancient sports trivia?"

Thank God It's Friday.

'One chatterbox, a natter natter and two shhhhh's please.'

'I drank 10 pints of rum.'

'I'm calling this a plate and I already have service for six. Six more and I can invent the dinner party.'

But MOM! It's no fair being sick on a Saturday! Can't I take a rain check and be sick on Monday?

White Wine Wisdom (2)

"Nice try, Frank. Mother is still coming for the weekend."

I conduct comprehensive surveys - I ask my girlfriend.

"Hey, Gary. Lois wanted to know if you’re up for waiting forever for reheated leftovers and sipping warm mimosas intended to ease the pain of poor service amid a cacophony of idiot tourists and 20-year-olds... you know, brunch."

"Not many of you may agree with me..."

'Only way I can get people in on a Sunday.'

"Want to come over Sunday, watch the game, and help me start dreading Monday?"

'Something for the weekend?Not with this haircut!'