Webbed Reviewer Gifts

"I appreciate how you've protected my privacy, Doc. I'm gonna tell everybody about it on my medical rating website!"

Thought for today: "All the world's a stage." - Shakespeare. And boy, are there a lot of drama critics.

A boy is sat at a desk, with five plaques implying different qualifications he has earned from using social media.

'Okay, found you. Now let's open the 'Review' link...'

"It started with a simple case of peer-review."

"Mom, please! I'm a married woman whose friends have been reviewed favourably by the New York Times."

"It's just one bad review and we all know who wrote it."

"I'm torn, Randy. I don't know what to think." "About what, little buddy?" "Star Trek. The last movie got rave reviews. Critics and audiences loved it. Therefore, I loved it too. But it didn't come anywhere close to earning $1 billion at the box office. And these days, any movie that doesn't earn $1 billion is a complete failure. Therefore, I must hate it. I'm in limbo until the hive mind comes to a consensus." "Except for honey, nothing good ever comes from hives."

"My best friend is my phone."

'Is there a psychiatrist in the house - the cast is very depressed over opening night reviews!'

No, no, Grok, we love your creative voice! Ort is just here to do a little punch-up.

"I've just been reincarnated, anyone here know what iphone we're up to?"

Man from 'National Viewers and Listeners Association sits at work boxes titled; 'Switch on' and 'Switch off'.

"I know your previous employer gave you an excellent reference, but you were self-employed."

The Music Critic.

'Those viewers who disagree with our editorial on TV violence has better keep their big mouths shut!'

'Horace spends his spare time being a rock critic.'

'I preferred her in the margarine commercial.'

Another new, really cool-looking gadget in a desperate search for a problem to solve.

Reviewing a Scientific Paper - Etiquette for References.

"What did I think about the play? About an hour too long!"

The Critic...

"Failure is definitely the best teacher, but I'm thinking auditing a class with Success might not hurt."

"How was the play!"

"Writing that book was a real strain."

'Just one criticism of you review of last night's opening play - you omitted to mention that the theatre burnt down while you were supposed to be there!'

How's my Sermon . . .

"I don't mind if something's Shakespearean, just as long as it it's not Shakespeare."

"Every good scene in that move was in the coming attractions...why did we even bother to come watch it?"

"They're going to print a retraction - your desserts are not inconsistent."

"You call that a suit?"

'Last month's technology' bin next to electronics store.

A new book with a little bit of this and a little bit of that.

'It's had the best reviews I've ever written.'

Redundant Technology.