Visionary Humorist Gifts

'You say you're having trouble seeing into the future'

'Your hindsight is no longer 20/20.'

'Very good, but not quite 'presidential vision'.'

'So much for his new glasses...he didn't see that coming'

'Frank, trust me...you need glasses.'

'I've lost my glasses and can't look for them until I find them.'

'What do you mean the Optometrist said these would be in your price range'

'You really do need new glasses!'

'Well, it looks like you need trifocals!'

"Why do I think you need glasses, Mr. Jones? For one thing...the chart is over this way!"

'Guess who I bumped into today? EVERYBODY!'

'$200 for this eye examination?!'

Opticians.

'Unknown fact: Cows aren't grazing...they're searching for their contact lenses.'

Smartphone reads eye chart

"You're going to need a pair of bifocals, and a pair of x-ray specs."

"Your vision isn't great. I'm going to recommend getting buttons."

"I replaced every window in my house. Then I discovered I had a crack in my glasses."

'You might want to lay off the carrots.'

'Julie,has anyone told you how beautiful you look today? If so send them in for an eye test straight away!'

'Better,much better...but do you think I could have some different frames?'

'Ophthalmologist'

Christmas Scene: Wise man with poor vision offering a gift to a sheep.

I wore my glasses to bed so I could see what I was dreaming.

'I usually let my lawyer take care of the small print.'

Eye Chart.

I let my lawyer take care of the small print, reading eye chart.

On this date in 1896: Phineas Hiddlemeyer creates the monocle contact lense.

'Man, when was the last time you had your eyes tested?'

'Thirteen'

"This franchise deal looks great! But I can't see the fine print."

"You can't read the form's fine print? Good! Step into our eyeglass sales department."

"And what can I do for you, young lady?"

"This is not a good start, is it!"

"I'm here because my vision is getting so bad I can't even see clearly in my dreams at night!"