Vision Humorist Gifts

"Your eyes are fine. I'ts just that on some eye charts they type is too small." The nearly blind leading the nearly blind.

'If the subject should ever come up, you can say you're legally blind.'

'Look at the ref He's wearing glasses over his contacts,'

Eye test through a keyhole.

"Now can you see the chart??"

'I'm not so much concerned about seeing floaters in my eyes as I am about the fact that I'm seeing inflatable duck floaties.'

"Gimme a large cheeseburger, regular fries and a diet root beer!"

Large print e-book.

"Are my breasts AI? No! My cartoonist would never use AI!"

'You say you're having trouble seeing into the future'

'Barry I think it's time you had your eyes checked!'

"Your problem isn't the prescription."

"Now, cover your second, fourth and seventh eyes and read the next line."

"All our flow charts are backing up!"

Ancient Egyptian eye tests.

A finger painting a painting of a vase and flowers.

'Unknown fact: Cows aren't grazing...they're searching for their contact lenses.'

'Man, when was the last time you had your eyes tested?'

'Guess who I bumped into today? EVERYBODY!'

"I'm here because my vision is getting so bad I can't even see clearly in my dreams at night!"

'Very good, but not quite 'presidential vision'.'

Groucho Glasses Eye Test

'Unknown fact: Cows aren't grazing...they're searching for their contact lenses.'

"Everybody freeze! This is a stickup!"

"Well, Mr. Swanson, I don't know that I can help you improve your standing in your focus group, but I can definitely check out your visual focus."

'My eyesight was getting worse, but thanks to my new glasses, I can play 'Monkey see, Monkey do' again...'

"I think an IQ test would be more appropriate at this time."

Bolting your Food.

'So much for his new glasses...he didn't see that coming'

'You really do need new glasses!'

Smartphone reads eye chart

Peripheral vision cow

'Julie,has anyone told you how beautiful you look today? If so send them in for an eye test straight away!'

'If the subject should ever come up, you can say you're legally blind'

John's Laser Shop and Eye Patches 4 U Shops