Vision Supporter Gifts

"Our seniors special includes an upgrade to 'billboard-size' font."

'My feet are killing me.'

'Have you been 'helping the environment by supporting local produce' again?'

"Just one more thump. . . just one more thump."

'Yes, Jenny, I know I'm always reminding the team to be good sports, but you really don't have to thank the ref after every call.'

Supermarket - World Cup Specials

"Giving is down at the church, so we are charging an entrance fee."

100k Desert Crawl

Light RELIEF for England . . . PHEW!

'And now, concerning the special collection...'

Money Flow increases as Tiger Woods returns to the game.

World Cup Fan.

Vicar prays for money for church repairs.

"I told him he was allowed one phone call. He's making a pledge to Channel 13."

"I'm against pain killers for players, but I'm for them for supporters."

"I'm so grateful to play for this fantastic club....a childhood dream come true!"

'Break a leg.' - 'Thanks a lot.'

'The problem isn't your high definition television, it's your low definition eyes.'

"Bad news: all those pink NFL uniforms don't actually cure breast cancer."

Football merchandising - 1953.

Masochistic Soccer Fan

Yesterday of Minnesota.

One cappuccino please, and I wanted to give you this. A note. How formal. Dear small local independent coffee house ... I went to Starbucks this morning. I'm sorry. Can you ever forgive me? What if I agree to purge what I ate? The written apology is sufficient.

"He's not my dog, he's my partner."

Alex Ferguson

Brendan suddenly realizes it was a mistake posting 'Susan, will you marry me?' to the stadium's jumble tron.

"Sometimes, I wish we'd never invented football."

Sports area vendors.

STRIP *The Fan * Thinking of ditching Coventry City

"You need glasses, dear."

Small store loses out to glossy big store

"I think babies grow in a mommy's tummy and adopted babies grow in a mommy's heart."

"How old were you before you discovered our football song wasn't the national anthem?"

Manuel Pellegrini

'I know the club is broke, but this is going too far.'