Vision Care Fan Gifts

Good News, You have perfect 20 vision!

"I’ve tried to make this as painless as possible ... clearly I’ve failed."

First aid in mountains

'Transylvania's most famous Optometrist 'Count Mracula'.'

"Tut tut. You're only having a baby, if you had my flu last week you'd know what real pain was."

'Sorry the doctor is running behind. You can keep today's appointment or I can fit you in tomorrow...whichever comes first.'

Hospital Departments

"Do you feel your eyes have changed any since your last visit?" "No. They seem to be ho, ho, ho, holding their own."

'The other kids at school say I might need glasses, Dad.'

Musical Eye Test

Dog being carried off by ducks.

A question you don't want - "How many fingers am I holding up."

"Do you have a family history of this condition?"

"Ralph - you'd play better golf if you had your eyes checked."

National Optometrists Association. O.K., whose idea was it to form a focus group?…

'You have a 9:00 A.M. appointment with your ophthalmologist to check your vision and a 11:00 A.M. appointment with the staff to rally the troops around your vision.'

Optician: 'I can't seem to switch off.'

J. Greeble, MD: Practice limited to simple, straightforward, old-fashioned diseases.

'Unknown fact: Cows aren't grazing...they're searching for their contact lenses.'

"Oh, come on ref. How can you not see that?!"

'No,if you'll read the eyes-in-the-back-off-your-head chart, I check your mom vision,'

'Very good, but not quite 'presidential vision'.'

Groucho Glasses Eye Test

Hen to optometrist about chicks: 'I'm here to check my peepers.'

George Washington's Birthday

"Am I seeing double? You and your twin are the experts, why don't you two tell me!"

Dr. Harper had a special eye exam chart made for hieroglyphics professor patient.

"I'm here for an examination, my ditzy missus thinks I may need glasses."

"The side lenses will help you maintain visual acuity when looking askance."

'It quickly became apparent that Optometry was not the right career choice for Errol'. 'Is that the right one? I can't tell!'

"Let's say that's better without, shall we?"

A footballer is having an eye test.

"I'm here because I keep bumping into old friends. Like, literally bumping into them."

A Pirate at the Opticians.

Header: Franchising of Optometry Caption: 'With every new pair of glasses you get a cheap plastic toy of a character from the latest kids movie'