Veggie Enforcer Gifts

Grandchildren's Menu: Whatever's on your plate and no funny business

Life with a professional baseball catcher.

Prize vegetables.

'I'm a vegetarian.' - 'If it's so wrong to eat animals, why are they made out of meat?'

"...and that growl has turned many a hunter into vegetarians!"

'May future generations forgive you for eating that sausage...'

Get your no-turkey recipes here! Eco club. Go veggie for T-day! No thanks! I like turkey, sausage, stuffing, creamed onions with bacon and mincemeat pie. I figured as much. How can you tell? Gut check. That's my gut reaction, too.

'The vegetables sat in the crisper for hours...days...a whole week. Then suddenly, the drawer opened. A hand reached in, grabbed the kale, and all you could hear was the sound of...A Garbage disposal.'

"I hope we can sell everything before it's time for mom to make dinner."

Veggie Hall of Fame.

"You can't make me eat Brussel sprouts Mum: it's illegal to force-feed geese in this country!"

"Relax. They're just crows."

Vegetarian Nightmare.

"I love finding my food at the Farmers Market. Makes me feel like a true pioneer."

'Because Thanksgiving is about a bountiful harvest. That's why we have to eat all these vegetables.'

"Sorry kids, wrong house. This one is made of vegetables."

Mom's Diner/Mom's Desserts

'Meat cooked, but carrots still hard.' Hand in pot

Mom? Eco club is starting a campaign to eat local food. Good idea. Would you please pack me a lunch from organic stuff grown near here? Ok. I'm sure we have something. Thanks! Oh, boy. A beet sandwich.

'great win, kids! Let's celebrate... My treat!!'

'Dad, you know that I'd never buy a pet that eats meat. Luckily, I found a guy who sold me the World's only vegetarian dog!'

"My mom is a vegetarian, so she doesn't bring home the bacon. She brings home kale and quinoa."

Help!I am being forced to eat vegetables

If we build raised beds and a compost bin now

"I didn't realize there was so many different kinds of vegetables!"

Taken genetic engineering too far

September: All the familiar signs of harvest are with us once more.

'The Ailing Matisse tries cutting out meat and dairy products.'

'No, you can't complain to the waiter about the vegetables floating in your soup. It's vegetable soup!'

'They send you into the ketchup department? HA! I'M going into pizza!'

"Don't try the candied yams and sweet peas, turns out they are vegetables."

“Children hate me.”

'No, you can't turn your vegetables into bio-fuel.'

'You're right, Mom. Carrots did give me good eyesight. Now I can spot vegetables I don't like a mile away.'

'Mom, your diet says you can eat all the vegetables you want. Wow! A diet without vegetables!'