Vegetarian Virtuosos Gifts

Alice became the first person in history to be beatend to death with 'vegetarian turducken'."

Allotment

'You wouldn't happen to be sitting on my entry to the straightest runner bean competition?'

"Our fresh seasonal hand-crafted brews contain a full serving of spring vegetables."

MUSHROOM MASACRE.

'So glad you could make our vegetarian BBQ.'

Queen of Quinoa

Herbophiles protest mass killings of plants.

Give quiche a chance!

"Your momma lied to you, boy."

"Grapes, Rye, Malt... I got into this through my vegetarianism."

'Say low-cholesterol dairy-free alternative to cheese!'

'You may not feel any healthier right away, but you'll definitely feel more smug.'

'I told you it wouldn't work.'

Excellent crop! What's your secret?

Veggie Hall of Fame.

Onion Tears

Rap-scallions

A butcher announcing he will kill his own meat

Avocado Timeline

"I eat a totally plant-based diet and I still can't lose weight."

"Why... are there so many people who never eat pork? Because we have some excellent PR people working on our behalf."

"Are you mad with us, Mrs. Bimmelman?"

"Mother will never be able to rest on her laurels. If they're green, she'll cook them."

"Hey, this is just a bun!" "Help yourself to the mustard."

The Rabbit Meeting.

'And since this product consists of 100% artificial ingredients, we can truthfully say it's vegan!'

'Vegetable proteins sure have caught on. I have to go over to Canyon Gulch and round up a herd of soybeans.'

A sheep ordering in a restaurant - the sole item on the menu is grass.

"I told the cook I would prefer that she use some kind of artificial blackbird substitute."

'Eat your lettuce. It'll put colour back in your cheeks.'

Two vegetarians please.

'Carrot salad, carrot casserole, carrot juice, carrot cake - I want steak!'