Vaping Humorist Gifts

"I gave up fire breathing and switched to vaping."

Teapot

'Catch this!'

Viola, cello, 1st violin and 2nd violin vending machine.

Smokers smoking on the moon, Astronauts smoking on the moon

'our chances seemed pretty good until you lighted that 20.'

"I'm afraid the umbrella constitutes an enclosed space and must be taken down."

Passover Plague

"I think we've got another novel virus here."

'We can do extensive blood work, take x-rays, check your prostate. . .or I could sell you some great weed for $50.'

'Why can't you just chew bones like other dogs?' (dog smoking pipe).

"I only allow myself one after a meal - I'm now down to 43 meals a day!"

"Any pain relief with the cannabis?"

The Germ and the Sperm

'If you want to smoke, you'll have to go outside.'

"That's why you don't smoke near the dang cannon!"

'Well actually, the only reason I put my head out of the window is that Master smokes while driving...'

'Well the dog's been passively smoking our fags for the past ten years, so I think it's only fair that he has a nicotene patch too.'

'I used to be a pack animal. Lately, I've become a two pack animal.'

''Stop smoking'? -- but my psychiatrist just told me to start!'

'Smoking or non-smoking?'

Tim's hopes for his safer smoking device were to be dashed when it failed to fit through the door...

"I'm not sure if that's William Shatner or Deadpool without his mask."

Prehistoric Cigarette Lighter

"Smoking causes cancer in humans. I'm canine."

"I'm afraid you've got Sea Monkey pox."

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Grumpy man telling a teddy bear whoes watching TV to get out of his chair

"You tested positive. But it looks like you're just a carrier."

Bathing Flowers.

'The ones who smoke, masturbate... the ones who don't smoke, masturbate... is this a study on smoking or masturbation?'

"You should have mentioned in your resume that you could only do it once."

Smoking and non-smoking sides of a Volcano.

"See? Right there - it says bubblegum."

If they ban smoking in cars...