Smoker Humorists Gifts

Grumpy man telling a teddy bear whoes watching TV to get out of his chair

Smoking and non-smoking sides of a Volcano.

'Do you mind!!?'

"Since I've gone over to roll-ups I find I can get by on just one cigarette a day!"

Smokers smoking on the moon, Astronauts smoking on the moon

'our chances seemed pretty good until you lighted that 20.'

"I'm afraid the umbrella constitutes an enclosed space and must be taken down."

"The dog wants out again!"

"I only allow myself one after a meal - I'm now down to 43 meals a day!"

'Why can't you just chew bones like other dogs?' (dog smoking pipe).

'Well actually, the only reason I put my head out of the window is that Master smokes while driving...'

'If you want to smoke, you'll have to go outside.'

'Forget about going to the store for a bicycle patch. I used one of your nicotine patches.'

"That's why you don't smoke near the dang cannon!"

igloo smoking zone...

Snowman with 'No Smoking' sign.

'Well the dog's been passively smoking our fags for the past ten years, so I think it's only fair that he has a nicotene patch too.'

"He said if we don't let him in, he'll huff and he'll puff and he'll fill up our whole house with cigar smoke."

'I used to be a pack animal. Lately, I've become a two pack animal.'

'Smoking or non-smoking?'

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Prehistoric Cigarette Lighter

"I gave up fire breathing and switched to vaping."

"Smoking causes cancer in humans. I'm canine."

Tim's hopes for his safer smoking device were to be dashed when it failed to fit through the door...

Punch has a smoking break.

'Aren't we entitled to a ten minute smoking break?'

Hell's Smoking Section

'It's a filthy and nasty habit, but at least, you won't end up with yellow teeth...'

Snowman

'The ones who smoke, masturbate... the ones who don't smoke, masturbate... is this a study on smoking or masturbation?'

"See? Right there - it says bubblegum."

"You should have mentioned in your resume that you could only do it once."

If they ban smoking in cars...

Casino - featuring pre-owned cigarette smoke.