Smoking Humor Gifts

Casino - featuring pre-owned cigarette smoke.

Smoke signals using a cigarette.

'Do you mind!!?'

Smokers smoking on the moon, Astronauts smoking on the moon

"Since I've gone over to roll-ups I find I can get by on just one cigarette a day!"

'our chances seemed pretty good until you lighted that 20.'

"I'm afraid the umbrella constitutes an enclosed space and must be taken down."

"The dog wants out again!"

'Which dog is named 'BOGART'?'

'Why can't you just chew bones like other dogs?' (dog smoking pipe).

"I only allow myself one after a meal - I'm now down to 43 meals a day!"

igloo smoking zone...

'Well actually, the only reason I put my head out of the window is that Master smokes while driving...'

"That's why you don't smoke near the dang cannon!"

Snowman with 'No Smoking' sign.

'Well the dog's been passively smoking our fags for the past ten years, so I think it's only fair that he has a nicotene patch too.'

"He said if we don't let him in, he'll huff and he'll puff and he'll fill up our whole house with cigar smoke."

"Smoking causes cancer in humans. I'm canine."

All Organic Pork: "Naturally smoked bacon my ass."

'I used to be a pack animal. Lately, I've become a two pack animal.'

Tim's hopes for his safer smoking device were to be dashed when it failed to fit through the door...

Prehistoric Cigarette Lighter

'Smoking or non-smoking?'

Grumpy man telling a teddy bear whoes watching TV to get out of his chair

"We think he picked it up at the kennel."

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'Aren't we entitled to a ten minute smoking break?'

'The ones who smoke, masturbate... the ones who don't smoke, masturbate... is this a study on smoking or masturbation?'

Snowman

If they ban smoking in cars...

'It's a filthy and nasty habit, but at least, you won't end up with yellow teeth...'

"You should have mentioned in your resume that you could only do it once."

Signs at the entrance of a cemetery pointing to the "Smoking" and "Non-smoking" sections.

"See? Right there - it says bubblegum."

Hell's Smoking Section